Poetry

Good Ol' Boys of the Ozarks
(GOBOS)

The realtor cheats the customer
The lawyer cheats the client

The Christian curses the Jew
The Southerner curses the Northerner

The meth dealer attacks the neighbor
The sheriff attacks the victim

The prosecutor violates the witness
The judge violates the plaintiff

The politician betrays the constituent
The government betrays the citizen

Ozark justice is elusive and illusive
Because GOBOS are abusive and collusive


* Good Ol' Girls of the Ozarks are GOGOS.
**The GOBOS and GOGOS are criminals with hymnals.
***The Ozarkopathy logo is called the GOBO-GOGO-LOGO.



IF I CAN'T LIVE IN YOUR COUNTY THEN GET YOUR COUNTY OUT OF MY COUNTRY!

You're allowed to cheat us
But we're not allowed to litigate

You're allowed to slander us
But we're not allowed to expose you

You're allowed to curse and threaten us
But we're not allowed to report you

You're allowed to shoot at us
But we're not allowed to call the police

You're allowed to have cronies and accomplices
But we're not allowed to have friends

You're allowed to be criminals
But we're not allowed to be citizens

You have special rights
But we don't have civil rights


OZARK OXYMORONS

Living is cheap
but so is life

Life is hard
but death is easy

Hospitality is rare
but hospitalization is common

Amenities are few
but enemies are many

Spaces are open
but minds are closed

Mercy is rare
but mercenaries are common

Minorities are persecuted
but criminals are not prosecuted

Laws exist
but lawyers don't

Traffic is light
but trafficking is heavy

Survival is rare
but conniving is common

Collision insurance is optional
but collusion insurance is mandatory

Villages are common
but so is pillaging

People are few
but steeples are many

Jesus is loved
but Jews are hated

Jesus is venerated
but Judas is emulated

The Cross is worshipped
but the double-cross is practiced

The Cross is worshipped on Sunday
but burned on Monday

Parishioners pray for revival
but visitors pray for survival

Heaven is taught
but hell is wrought

It's called the heartland
but the people are heartless

It's not the Land of Milk and Honey
but the Land of Bilk and Cunning


CIVIL RIGHTS 101

Foreigners are not Americans
with funny accents

Native Americans are not Europeans
with no homeland

Mexicans are not Anglos
with Spanish names

Jews are not gentiles
with wrong beliefs

Blacks are not Caucasians
with dark skin

Women are not men
with missing parts

Gays are not straights
with sick ideas

Disabled people are not people
with poor work habits

Differences are not deficiencies
but signs of God's proficiency


LITTLE BROWN BOY

I'm two years old. I'm a happy boy.
Mommy and Daddy buy me toys.
I live in a city, a scary place.
People don't like my little brown face.
I want to be home in my own little bed.
But they took me away, and now I'm dead.

They took me away. I don't know why.
A mean man shakes me till I cry.
My little brown body is black and blue.
Daddy, I want to go home with you.
I want to be home in my own little bed.
But they took me away, and now I'm dead.


* Dedicated to Dominic James, who was shaken to death by his white foster father in Springfield, Missouri, on August 21, 2002.



GENTLE BLACK MAN

Mama, I'm sorry
It must have hurt you so
Mama, please listen
I have to let you know

Vultures surround me
They want me to be dead
Vultures in white hoods
They bash me in the head

Mama, I struggle
I want to be with you
Mama, they hurt me
And all of Kenya too

Eagle beside me
They hang me with a noose
Eagle befriend me
I cannot get it loose

Mama, I love you
And now my soul is free
Mama, I'll see you
And give you all of me


* Dedicated to Regina Gakinya and her son, Leonard, who was found hanging from a radio tower in Springfield, Missouri, on October 2, 2002.


OZARK MACHINE

The Ozark Machine
is the Devil's limousine

You are the passenger
and politics the chauffeur

So whether you turn right or left
you are going to Hell



SINISTER MINISTER

Let's play follow the leader
I'll be the guru; you'll be the yahoo
I'll make you feel whole
If you give me your soul
No more confusion, guilt, or loneliness
Just certainty, forgiveness, and homeyness

Individualism is passé and full of pride
An anachronistic thorn in society's side
Join, cooperate, and blend
And thereby end
Your painful I-ness
But call me Your Highness



OUR FRIEND CHERYL

With her dreadlocks and cocoa skin
  her big laugh and bayou way,
With her notebook and pen in hand
  Cheryl Fischer enters the fray!

Upsets the good ol' girls and boys
  with every word she writes
Upsets the Ozark status quo
  and fights for civil rights!



DEAR GOBOS AND GOGOS

Here's our car
You can keep it

Here's our house
You can keep it

Here's our money
You can keep it

Here's our good will
Please return it


GOBOS - Good Ol' Boys of the Ozarks
GOGOS - Good Ol' Girls of the Ozarks


SOMETHING


Something is wrong in Missouri

Something illegal is happening in Missouri

Something secret is happening in Missouri

Something un-American is happening in Missouri

Something is being covered-up by Missouri and the Feds

What is that something?



ASSOCIATION


An association exists between Missouri and drugs

An association exists between Missouri and fraud

An association exists between Missouri and murder

An association exists between Missouri and corruption

What is that association?

Kind of spooky, isn't it?



AIRBORNE

White lilacs tremble in their vase
for wind is strong this April day

While widow dons her mourning daze
white lilacs tremble in their vase

While guns salute and bugle plays
brave Archie Lambeth's laid away

White lilacs tremble in their vase
for wind is strong this April day


* This poem is dedicated to our dear friend, Archie Lambeth, who died on April 15, 2006, from bone cancer caused by exposure to Agent Orange. He was an Army Ranger (Airborne) in Vietnam and served our country with courage and distinction. Archie will be deeply missed by his family and friends.